Join me in death

My life has totally changed ....I miss work,my friends,booze ..pretty much everything...Hopefully life will be on track soon as long as no more hosp. stays...my app to tell me about surgery is june 4th I feel like its the hugest wait everrr...fucking car accidents that arent your fault ..sickkk brooo


+ moving by july 1st    I cant wait 

                                                                                                                                                         XOXO

Current Mood: blah
Current Music: brand new

+ seeing danielle
- being sick
+ sarahhhhhh on tuesday
+ my wife and I getting tattooed soon IMSIKEDDD
- work
- dudes
- being sleepy
--- drama
+ being hott
+ papa roach

LJ so old .....I miss hanging out.....Get in touch friends...xoxo

So I finally have my own sweet laptop and internet for the first time in years...So I'm going to be the biggest computer geek ever .. just like when I was 16.. Man I missed gay ol live journal!!...Updates since forever I live back home I start a new job on the 6th of feb ..I'm very single and super happy...I spent the summer and past months finding what I want to do in life and trying to be happy alone sumthing I never wanted to do But I'm happy its sweet...I finished bartending school and hope to go to hair school in the spring and move out with my girl lo lo heheh...It was a poopy year I hate moving ..my doggie died RIP ..and I dated a tool and missed out on my friends ...Now I'm back to being fun and shit...I miss my friends who dont live in RI alot...XOXO

Current Mood: blank
Current Music: Rod Stewart

cape cod no snow when i get home will there be snow ???

hott pink hair rules

I miss my friends xo

I need a job

I love my tim

Cant wait for november


Halloween rulessssss

I made a Quiz for you! Take my Quiz! and then Check out the Scoreboard!

Yay danielle is coming home soon ..... I cant wait to go in the sea

Moving back home this week wooooo

I miss you
I cant stop crying I hate everything

I love the new NIN


XOXO

I havent updated in almost a month

This month has been full of random

I still hate work I'm still very single for the most part ...

I need to hang out more

I love my puppy a huge amount

I love lady friday nights

I'm still really in love but it doesnt matter

I still live with audi p even tho no one thought it would work out !!!

I think I want a boyfriend nowadays

I think I wanna finally calm down a bit

Its beeen a longgggg yearrr already

I have this gross cough that wont go away I hate hate being sick

I also love drinking again

xxooxoxooxoxoxo

Current Mood: cold
Current Music: converge

I have a new best friend a six week old lil puppy pit bull named booo ! How I love her so so much ....


Other than that my life sucks a bunch

bills being lonely and unhappy no sleep and feeling like crap


I wish you wanted me as much as I want you


XOOXOXOXOXOXO

**application for my boyfriend**


Must look dead
Must like top gun and HIM
Must have great hair and not to bright so I look smart
Should be a morgue worker
Likes to sit and do nothing
Drinker / smoker a must

If you are any of these Thats awesome XOOXOX

Its 2 am

and i feel like sumdays my heart gets ripped out and shit on by more than one person

I misss everything I want my old life back


XOOXOXO

I cant explain anything I feel
I miss so so much of all different things
no one understands
I feel like I have really hit rock bottom
I wish u were here
I have lost myself xoxo

Current Mood: depressed

TUESDAY 9 pm sharp

Jackie C's I never got to have a 21st bithday/ pre 80's / metal night / Happy new year Party will be going on.... I want everyone there post back for directions

BYOB is nice and my sum for me and the roomate

OXOXOOXOXOXO

Current Music: motley crue

This isnt like me...... 16 hours of sleep no parties thank god i own more water proof eyeliner than anyone I know....I have no idea what to do ..Do i ignore him or do i see him...I have no idea about life follow your heart or be smart and dont get hurt anymore People who know me the best tell me different things I cant picture not talking to him I cant sleep or eat ..What the fuck ... I feel like a walking open cut I cant stop crying even in public why is this its out of my normal self i feel like people close to me dont care just the good old stop crying get off the couch shit i wish someone would shit down and talk to me about things and honently realize what i think and how much i care about this person ......

Yea 2 nights of no sleep 2 boxes of tissues and 3 packs of cigs later I can finally say I'm really really not a happy person..Sumtimes you think U have everything cuz u want to pretend everythings fine so you wont hurt .But it was time to grow balls and realize im a mess of hurt with a huge broken heart...Trust is not sumthing I give everyone So when I do u you take care of it and not shit allll over it ..You were my best friend and more now theres sum huge weird void and it hurts me to look at you....I never thought it would be like this...my belly hurts...and my eyes are pufffy How could you do this to me ? I never did anything wrong to you.... But I guess what comes around goes around....Im not going to ever get over this...

Another slam to my life was mike addressing me as a friend to audra is that alll i am now ..Just sum girl you know...???


Maybe i got everything I desevered in life and now that whole karma thing is over and I can be ok


I feel bad for sum people cuz there to dumb to realize whats up and they will let a dumb boy shit all over them....

Current Mood: depressed

everything is wrong and no one cares

HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY TO ME


I cant wait to have so much fun the next couple of days xooxoxoxo

What a shit ball week of feeling like theres nothing left in life

I just want you around... I sleep much better when your arms are wrapped around me..No matter what happens or how I act or the things you do sum how all things are forgotten when I look into your eyes...I feel much better about things when in the morning I can roll over and see you there...Your my best friend in the whole world I could never hate you...
Im going to be the most bitter girl ever now...


This week sucked so much ..I have done so much crying and thinking and gotten a retarded amount of sleep...I just have to let things flow I guess..I cant make people feel the way I want them to..I feel alone its weird but Im not alone I have friends and stuff..Everything upsets me latley I just want him in my life and no one else hearing him say friends dont do that was a major bumout and lead to many many crying fits ..I dont understand why one day things are great and then next suck .I have turned into a huge fag I was never like this ..what happened..... im lost

Tonight is HIM Im so very very excited Vallo will take me away from this shit life....Man who ever reads this shit must think I have lost it...Out of all weeks to go see him,there will be sum crying no matter how hard I try to hold it in...

Dre is like my third roommate its fun ... No matter what time of the night I get up to smoke or get sum juice I always know I can find him on my couch. hehe

I may be fired from work this a huge bumout

XOOXOX

Current Mood: energetic
Current Music: morrisey